Why am I wearing blinders?

Why am I wearing blinders?

How many of you forget or ignore tasks and wait till the last minute to do them or are reminded to do them? I do it quite often. When I am working on some interesting project, I have blinders on. If it’s something with a deadline, it’s even worse. 

As it figures, this kind of hyper focus or fixation is not normal but rather a symptom of Bipolar Disorder, autism, ADHD and maybe other mental conditions. Let’s dig a bit deeper into what and why it happens. 

I have always lauded myself for my unwavering concentration. Last month I was working on some project with my head buried in my laptop. I had a list of things to do for myself and for the family. My husband kept reminding me of some chores that I had to take care of. In all honesty, it did not register. I knew how important they were but I simply didn’t remember. I was completely consumed by this project. The day before the deadline of the bills etc, something shook me up, apart from my extremely upset husband. 

What followed was a heated argument with me denying my lack of accountability. He had done his research on hyper fixation and wanted to bring it to my attention because it had been a repeated pattern of behaviour. After that day, I started remembering many incidents where I had been hyperfocused at the cost of something. For example, in art school, I worked non stop for 16 hours on my ceramics project and ended up not only with two surgeries but also having to give up ceramics. 

Some people may call it deep concentration that is good and helps you get things done. It is and you do get things done as long as you are aware that you are not stepping over the boundary. This is not that. Hyperfocus is where you concentrate on something to the extent that everything else ceases to exist. You forget your responsibilities, chores, people, even yourself, and are obsessed with only that one thing that you’re working on. 

This phenomenon can be particularly pronounced during certain phases of bipolar disorder, such as manic or hypomanic episodes, where individuals exhibit increased energy and focus. However, unlike hypomania, hyperfixation is not a standalone medical diagnosis but rather a symptom that can arise from various underlying conditions. Some key points to note about hyperfixation in bipolar disorder are:

  • It is characterized by an intense and prolonged focus on a specific interest or activity.
  • It can occur during manic or hypomanic episodes, where individuals experience increased energy and focus.
  • Hyperfixation is not a standalone medical diagnosis but rather a symptom of bipolar disorder.
  • It can arise from various underlying conditions.
  • Very often it can be followed by a bout of depression or feeling low. 
  • Hyper or hypo manic phases can be characterised by impulsive and risk taking behaviour. In such cases the person is not taking care of themself either and might end up self-harming.
  • In addition, hyperfixation may provide the need for the person to feel like they are in control and they can hide from real life problems. 

Like everything else about mental conditions, the answer lies in some sort of brain malfunction. 

Chemical imbalance in the neurotransmitters is the main reason for most medical conditions. Similarly, hyper focus or fixation occurs when there is a chemical imbalance in the brain. Unfortunately, there is no medicine for this. Here are some things that you can do-

  1. Now that I am aware that I have a tendency to do this, when I feel “Let me do a bit more”, I stop. 
  2. Friends and family are great indicators because you are hurting them by going into this obsessive cycle and they know you well enough to see you’re getting into the pattern. Ask them to remind you. 
  3. Set an alarm. Take breaks.
  4. Go for therapy. CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) is supposed to be effective. 

There is a vast amount of information on this topic on the internet. I have recommended two websites at the end. However, what I have written is just the tip of the iceberg. I highly recommend you to read more if you are getting hyperfixated. 

References

https://psychcentral.com/blog/bipolar-laid-bare/2016/10/bipolar-disorder-and-adhd-hyperfocus#1

https://bayareacbtcenter.com/bipolar-disorder-and-hyperfixation

Disclaimer

If you are experiencing any symptoms of depression, please contact a mental health professional. 

I am not a mental health professional. All blog posts are based on my subjective experiences and opinions.

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